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As the Eastern Seaboard braced for Hurricane Florence, many late-night hosts said they were worried about President Trump’s ability to respond to the storm. Speaking to reporters on Tuesday, Trump was characteristically short on details about his plans. But he did warn that Florence would be “tremendously big and tremendously wet.”
“Trump sounds like he’s doing a book report on hurricanes and he forgot to read the book. ‘Tremendously big and tremendously wet! Oh, and a lot of people don’t know this: The rain is coming from the top.’” — TREVOR NOAH
Trump added that he thought he had done an excellent job handling Hurricane Maria in Puerto Rico last year, but said that “nobody would understand that.” Noah pushed back, reminding viewers that 3,000 people had died as a result of Maria, and that it took almost a year for power to be restored to parts of the island.
On “The Daily Show,” Stephen Colbert said the president’s point about Maria was indeed hard to “understand.”
“Yes, it is hard to understand that. Like it’s hard to understand how in a certain way the Hindenburg crash was one of aviation’s most spectacular landings.” — STEPHEN COLBERT
As the debate over Trump’s trade policy continues, Jimmy Kimmel played video from speeches in which the president insisted that American companies hire American workers. Then Kimmel said that seemed hypocritical, given the president’s track record as a business owner.
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Trump “keeps saying, ‘Hire American,’ even though he doesn’t,” Kimmel said.
“In July, you may recall, they filed to hire 78 foreign workers at Mar-a-Lago, his golf club in Florida. And that doesn’t even include the 15 Russian spies he has working in the I.T. department.” — JIMMY KIMMEL
Trump and Kim
Jimmy Fallon poked fun at Trump for his increasingly friendly relationship with Kim Jong-un, the North Korean leader.
“The White House is now planning a second meeting between Trump and Kim Jong-un, which means in the last few months Trump will have seen Kim Jong-un twice as many times as he’s seen Melania.” — JIMMY FALLON
The Punchiest Punchlines (‘Swiped’ Edition)
“New York this month will host its second annual Miss Subways Pageant, where contestants profess their love for the city’s mass transit. Well, it’s scheduled for this month, but the pageant will actually get here sometime in November.” — SETH MEYERS
“I heard that there’s a new documentary about dating apps called ‘Swiped.’ Did you guys hear about this? People thought the preview looked good, but when they showed up it looked like a completely different movie.” — JIMMY FALLON
“The only people the president feels he can really trust are family. Which explains why he starts a new family every few years.” — JAMES CORDEN, on Donald Trump Jr.’s remark that his father was increasingly suspicious of his close advisers
“Amazon is going to sell Christmas trees this year. Live seven-foot Christmas trees will be available this holiday season. It’s not enough that Amazon’s putting every store out of business, now they’re going after the vacant stores’ parking lots, too.” — JIMMY KIMMEL
The Bits Worth Watching
James Corden does science with fire, liquid nitrogen and ice cream. And with Robert Winston, a British scientist and Labour Party politician.
Samantha Bee has an ambitious plan to incentivize turnout at the midterm elections, with a cellphone game. (Really.)
What We’re Excited About on Thursday Night
José Andres, the celebrity chef whose campaign to feed destitute Puerto Ricans in the wake of Hurricane Maria was largely successful — and potentially quite influential — will talk to Noah on Thursday.