Larry David’s Bernie Sanders Assures ‘SNL’ Fans He’ll Endorse Biden

Larry David’s Bernie Sanders groused from his home on “Saturday Night Live” that he’s always “a bridesmaid, never the Democratic nominee.”

“What the hell happened?” “Sanders” asked. “It didn’t help that the media lined up behind Joe Biden like he lines up behind the set of ladies’ shoulders,” he complained.

But relax, he told viewers. He will endorse Biden — especially because he would do anything to defeat Donald Trump. But his level of enthusiasm remains a question.

The real crisis, he noted, is the coronavirus. Health-care workers don’t have proper protective equipment. “They don’t have Purell, they don’t even have the little keychain that has the bottle of Purell that goes on your purse. Their gloves have holes in the fingers like Oliver Twist,” he said.

As for social distancing, he suggests a “half-wave — it’s 50% hello and 50% ‘Ehh go away, go away.’ It’s worked for me for years,” Sanders explained.

“In closing, I just want to say a sincere thank you to everyone who voted for me” … including “of course the hot girls who love weed,” he added.

And “stay safe, stay healthy, and please, whatever you do, stay the hell away from me.”